Christmas hadn’t even arrived yet, but Kim Tate was struck right where it hurt the most. People often think Kim is cold and tough, unmoved by anything.

But anyone who’s watched Emmerdale for a long time knows: Kim can be ruthless to others, but she deeply loves what she considers family.

And this time, what broke Kim wasn’t a conspiracy, not a power struggle at Home Farm, but the death of Ice, the horse that was an integral part of her life.

This pain is very real, because there’s no enemy to vent her anger on, no way to buy her back, no negotiation.

There’s only the moment of accepting that she can’t keep what she loves.

The scene where Kim confronts Ice’s loss is usually portrayed in a quiet yet heavy way. No lengthy dialogue is needed; just the way Kim stands there, the way she maintains her composure, is enough for viewers to understand that her heart is shattering into pieces. People like Kim, the more pain they feel, the more they try to control their emotions. She won’t cry loudly, she won’t scream for sympathy. Kim usually suffers in a way that… she holds it in, swallows it, and then lets that pain transform into a new layer of coldness. And that’s why losing Ice isn’t just losing a pet, but losing a place where Kim still knows how to be vulnerable.

The scary thing is that after a loss like this, Kim’s life will change. She’ll be less trusting, less likely to let anyone into her private world, and even harder for anyone to “see” her weakness. Home Farm may look like Home Farm on the outside, but inside, Kim is losing a spiritual anchor.